Stop and Smell the Snake Skin

I used to loathe fall break!

A whole week off to try and entertain my children while they drive me nuts. It sounds awful, but it's true. That's changed for me recently. I know Emmie is my last, and I want to soak up every minute of it.

You get to hear all kinds of crazy stories about my past or how we struggle to navigate life with autism. You rarely get to hear the good. This post is full of the good!

Ben and I have been waiting for a couple we could be friends with. The problem is both of us meshing with both of the other people. It's hard to do. Let me tell ya what God did for us!

We were sitting in church one Sunday a few months ago when Ben whispered to me that he knew a guy a few rows over. Now, Ben is the WORST at this. He thinks people are other people ALL THE TIME. He thought he saw someone he was active duty with in Panama City over 15 years ago. He told me he wanted to go say hi, and I told him he better not! Surely it wasn't really who he thought it was. After pulling up this man's profile on Facebook, I told him it looked enough like him to give it a shot. It was him! Turns out, he and his wife had recently moved to the area. They are now our good friends, Kyle and Hope. Emmie calls them HER Mr. Kyle and Ms. Soap.

Kyle and Hope are always down to hang out. The best thing about them is how they love Emmie. She is never in their way or a bother. She climbs on their laps and asks them to do annoying things and they always entertain her antics. I can't tell you what a blessing it is to have friends we can both hang out with at the same time while not having to worry about what Emmie is doing. Hope and I both know we crossed paths for a reason. God truly is amazing.

Kyle and Hope also have an awesome cabin in the mountains of eastern Tennessee. It's gorgeous! They invited us to spend part of fall break with them at their cabin. Of course we agreed! Secretly, I started to do what I always do. I get a little anxious about trips. The last time we went on a vacation in the mountains Emmie was horrible. We didn't have her diagnosed yet and we had no clue how to help her through transitions or meltdowns. She was obsessed with climbing the stairs in the cabin we rented. We had to move a couch over to block her from constantly climbing them. She was sharing a room with Ben and me and she would wake up in the middle of the night and not go back to sleep for hours. We decided to leave a whole day early at 9:00pm because we couldn't take another night! It was time to test our luck now that we've gotten control of most things.

We had an amazing trip! One of the best times ever! Emmie didn't have any issues riding in the car! It was a 7 and 1/2 hour trip there and she was a champ. No fussing or crying. I was already shocked by that once we arrived. She shared a bed with Ben each night and slept better than ever. She didn't mess with the stairs at all. I felt relaxed and Ben said he was too.

Others say they feel like we always seem on edge around Emmie. We probably do look that way. Our whole approach to parenting had to change when we realized Emmie was different than the other children we had raised. It's called gentle parenting, but to many it looks like we are push-overs. We've learned not to care. We talk about everything with her. We have to do that to help her process what she's thinking and feeling and put it into words so we can problem solve together. A lot of times this looks like she is pitching a fit and we are falling all over her to get her to stop. If you take the time to listen, we are talking her through what's happening. So, we may not look relaxed, but we are WAY more relaxed than two years ago.

Kyle and Hope really tried to make the trip fun for Emmie but we all had a blast. We really enjoyed the Tweetsie Railroad theme park. Hope and I laughed like fools on the tilt-a-whirl. My baby rode every ride in sight and fed every animal that would take food from her hands. We also biked on the Virginia Creeper Bike Trail. We rode about 17 miles (mostly downhill) through the most beautiful fall scenery I've ever seen. Little did I know, my bike was busted and I petaled way more than I should have had to. I was hurting that night, but it was okay! At one point we stopped for a break and Emmie and I sat in a field and listed all the pretty colors we saw. We said a prayer of thanks to God for making everything so beautiful for us!

It was so nice to leave our worries behind and just be surrounded by so much beauty. At one point Emmie got to see a bear one night on a side-by-side ride with Mr. Kyle. She was so excited to tell me all about it. Almost as excited as she was to show me the snake skin she found in the yard. The old me would have died! But I'm sort of excited that she is so curious and fearless about things like that. Ms. Soap did not share in the excitement!

The rest of fall break was spent with each other. Ben had off the rest of the week and we got back home to the boys. We visited a Japanese restaurant in Doraville that Braden and his girlfriend, Jasmine, like to go to. Jasmine is another blessing! She loves my son for who he is, which is very different from most. It's comforting to see him being loved and accepted and not having to change a thing about himself for her! He's tried so many new things out of his comfort zone because of her influence. She even got Brody on board with trying new things at the restaurant. It was so much fun!

To end our break, we took Emmie to the fair! I didn't really want to go because we had already done so much throughout the week, but Ben insisted. I'm so glad we did. My baby had the time of her life. I was so proud to see her wait patiently in lines for her turn. Not too long ago that was a major struggle for her. We stayed much longer than planned and enjoyed every minute of it. Towards the end of the night, Emmie had reached her limit and Ben walked her to the car while we finished eating the food we'd all just bought. As we walked to the car a few minutes later my mom and I talked about how we wished we could have ended the night on a good note instead of her throwing a fit. Not long ago, I would have let that ruin our whole day. I decided to look at it differently. I told my mom, "You know, of course it'd be nice if she didn't just have a melt down, but she had a really good day and I refuse to let that define our trip to the fair."

Sometimes we realize things are getting better.

God is answering prayers.

We stop and smell the snake skin, or the ramen noodles, or the corn dogs.